Change

There is a cycle to any change. So lets say that someone feels love then finds out that the other doesn't love them..then that's the change that takes place and it's the dealing with the change that is difficult for individuals to manuever.

The 6 stages to the Change Cycle include:
1. Loss: Feeling of Fear, Thoughts are cautious, Behavior is paralyzed.
2. Doubt: Feeling of resentment, thoughsts are skeptical behavior is resistant.
3. Discomfort: Feeling of anxiety, thoughts are confused, Behavior is unproductive
4. Discovery: Feeling of Anticipation, Thoughts are creative, Behavior is energized.
5. Understanding: feeling of confidence, thoughts are pragmatic, behavior is productive.
6. Integration: Feeliing of satisfaction, thoughts are focused, behavior is generous.

The better you get at change the quicker you go through the 6 stages. The dangerous thing is that many people spend too much time between stages 3 & 4 which cause them to become stagnant and sometimes start back at stage 1.

The key is believing that you can get through the change.
A friends mother told me...there are 3 stroms of life...A storm is coming, your in the middle of storm, or coming out of one. Get yourself to get through these stages as quickly as possible. You'll be a lot better equiped to handle change without it affecting you adversely.

You'll observe in your own life that these stages of change happen in every change of your life.

Black History Continues

I know I'm a little early for Black History Month. I was emailed the attached video and if you can I think you should send it to all that you know as well.

I know that the brothas and sisters of the blog world are very conscious, take pride in our history and make differences in ways that they may not even know to this world. I'm putting this video on my blog to remind us of our strength, courage and resiliency. We as bloggers do make a difference. So lets continue that by using this video as a reminder of who we are and what we are capable of.

I remember in elementary school after Martin Luther King died singing...We Shall Overcome. We have overcome many things since then, but isn't it time that we come together and continue to grow remembering that there continue to be obstacles and forces that may be in place to stunt our excellence?

A War For Your Soul-Birmingham version from Erisai Films on Vimeo.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Missing Grandma

I'm missing my Grandmother sooooo very much.



She taught me that anything that I want is mine. She loved all of us very much and her lesson was always that all my needs are already done.

I Got It!!

If you didn't know I'm in a all male bookclub. Every year we usually have a Holiday Party for ourselves. This year our party was a lil different. Most times we'll have good music, food, lots of people and drankin! Just a fun time.

This year I decided to do something a little different. We played cards and we gambled. The game is called "I Got It". We had music, food, and lots of drankin but this time just a few people. About 12 people showed up. This is how the game is played. I think you and your friends will love it as much as we do.

I GOT IT RULES:

Bring your change (You might want to bring some bills too if the pot gets too high. We weren't accepting any IOUs dammit). Each player puts in a coin. (We started off with dimes. You can play with any denomination you wish, from pennies to dollar bills) The Dealer deals two cards to each player. You then must determine if you think you have the highest cards in the group.

Note: Ace is the higest card. However, double any card in the deck will beat an Ace. ( 2 -two's, 2-sixes etc) So lets say 2 people think they have it. One person has an Ace and a 9. Another has an Ace and a 8. The Ace and 9 wins. If both of the players had double cards 2-twos and 2-sixes. The 2-sixes win because of course they are higher than the twos.

Once everyone has their cards the question is asked around the group one at a time to the left of the dealer. "Do you have it?" Each player responds whether they have it or not. If a player says he has it, do not reveal your cards until everyone has responded. Once everyone has responded, the 1st person to say they have it must show at least 1 card. The each person after stating they have it must do the same. (this is really for drama..you could reveal both cards at the same time.) Then the 2nd card is revealed and the one who has the highest of the two cards or doubles collects the pot.

The Pot:

Here's the kicker!! The players that said they had it, but didn't must anty up the amount of money that is in the current pot for the next hand.

1st round - 4 people paying for dimes the 1st pot would be 40 cents. 2 people said they had it. The looser(s) must anty up 40 cents and the other 3 players anty up 10 cents. The next pot is now 70 cents.

So lets say in the 2nd round the same thing happens only 2 say they have it. The looser must anty up for the next round 70 cents. (See how fast the pot rises?)

Don't be scared though because if everyone says they don't have it and it gets back to the dealer he can say that he has it and could win with cards that he would never say he had it with if not in that position. For instance the dealer could win with a 3 and a 7. Now would you want that to happen?? So if you want to have some fun over the holidays try I Got It.

Oh yeah, you know how people are always coming late to parties? If you've already started a game the newcomers can't get in until no one says they have it and the dealer wins by default. I say you can make up your own rules on that one.

Another thing we did was to take a break from the game every hour. You know, bathroom breaks, drink breaks, more food break, and smoking of cigarettes and otha thangs.

Enjoy!!!

Happy Holidays

I know I haven't been posting lately. Year end work is nothing nice. However, I would be amiss if I didn't wish all of you a very Happy Holiday Season. May you all remain safe throughout the season and the coming year!!!

The Holidays

The Holidays have crept up on us once again. I hope you all had a very Happy Thanksgiving.

Mine was good and I ate like it was my last supper. I still feel it. I'm not going to do the same thing for xmas. I promise myself that. I'm going to start working on me a lil more...physically that is. Wish me luck. I've had my gym bag with clothes in the truck of my car for about 2 months and have not once stepped into the state of the art gym that was built for employees in my office building.

Something about working out with co-workers all around just seems weird to me. I don't want to see none of them nekked and don't want them to see me either. Just too weird. I heard there's one guy in the office that chooses to wait til people are in the locker room to have a conversation and talks to them butt ass naked. Throwing up in my mouth just thinking about that.

I gotta work through that working out with other employee thing. I'm going to set a date for myself right after the month end garbage that I have to do.

Well I hope you all didn't eat as much as I did for Thanksgiving. I won't be doing that for Christmas! I mean it! LOL

Happy Holidays to all of you in blog world. Wishing you the best that the season and year has to offer. Make the best of everything that you experience. Let the experiences soak in with a positive light.

Questions Again

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
A newscaster and a great uncle

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
Really cried when my grandmother passed away.

3. Do you like your handwriting?
Yes

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
Bologna

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
No

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Oh yes - My best friend

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS ?
Yes

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
uhhhh no

10. Favorite Oatmeal
None hate that slop

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
How else are you going to get them off. dumb question.

12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG?
Yes I do.

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
McConnell's Cappucino Ice Cream....mmm

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
Their skin

15. RED OR PINK?
Red

16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
My Height

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST
Grandmother

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU?
Doesn't matter it's just something for people to think about.

19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
Beige pants and brown shoes

20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
Some crackers...I better eat a real meal soon.

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
Fran Dresher on the Wendy Williams Show

22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
Blue

23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
Clean ones

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOu TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
Some fool at work with a problem.

25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS?
yeah, He aight

26. Any Sport
Track & gymnastics

27. HAIR COLOR?
Dark Brown

28. EYE COLOR?
Brown

29. Do you wear contacts?
No

30. FAVORITE FOOD?
Thai and Soul food

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
Both

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
Precious

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU wearing?
Blue

34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
Summer

35. HUGS OR KISSES?
Kisses

36. FAVORITE DESSERT?
I was going to say cherry pie...but then I had the red velvet cheese cake at the Cheesecake Factory...mmmmm

37. What book are you reading now?
The Help by Kathryn Stockett

38. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
Dell

391. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON T.V. LAST NIGHT?
Desparate Housewives

40. FAVORITE SOUND
Ledisi Singing

41. GROUPS OR SOLO SINGER?
Solo

42. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
Africa

43. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
I paint.

44. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
Maryland

45. WHAT TIME IS IT NOW?
8:04pm

46. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU PRAYED?
A few moments ago

47. IF YOU COULD CHANGE ONE THING WHAT WOULD IT BE?

Time.

No Words

No words describe how I felt about this performance other than the obvious. It made me feel like one of those times when you wish you could go back in time and make different decisions listening to this song and rendition. If I could go back to the time when Whitney sounded like this, I am sure my life would be somewhat different today. Makes you wonder what the turning point was when you end up going in that direction you now wish you could change.

Happy Halloween Dammit!

I'm not one that goes to Halloween Parties a lot. However, this year I was kinda looking forward to it. I even got invited to 4 Halloween Parties!

Well no need for me to get all excited cuz I won't be going to any of them because of this damn month-end work that I have to do. I started the process at 9pm yesterday. The program took until 10:30 am this morning to complete. Then I have to run some reports on the data. Because this program is soooo crappy. It never picks up all the documents that it's supposed to. As it happens every F*$#ing month more than 1500 records have to be processed again. This took almost 4 hours and then still 1000 records still didn't run. Now I have to run these 1000 again. I'm sooo pissed about this mess. It has completely ruined my chance to have some fun on Halloween.

I'm writing on this blog while that bitchass program is running. Lawd let it take an hour. (wishful thinking)

Oh yeah I was going to be a Black Panther this year. I got the afro wig and errthang!

Anyway, Happy Hallo-damn-ween!!