Sunday, March 02, 2008

I was depressed.

There was a time when I was depressed. I felt like everyone around me took little pieces of my soul. They took those pieces and threw them to the side with the junk mail. At their whim they took those pieces and bounced them off the wall. Then threw it back with the junk mail to contemplate throwing out with the trash. There was a time when I was depressed. I felt like I was all alone in a room and no one could hear my cries for help. No one saw me crying. No one cared if I was crying. No one took the time to see. There was a time when I was depressed.

Who are these people that attempt to circumvent your world of peace with their malicious folly? Well I realized who they were. They are the ones that were depressed and not me. They are the ones whose souls were in pieces not mine. They were the ones who were crying and didn't want anyone to know.

I realized that I have a good life. I realized that I'm a good man with good intentions. I realized that my love is precious and abundant. I have more than enough to give. I realized my soul is whole. I realized that I am loved. Cuz I love me and it feels so good.

Along time ago I was only dreaming and now I'm awake with reality.

12 comments:

Curious said...

You are lucky. It takes some people many years to find that kind of love for themselves.

Most of us will ususally live and die by the way that others think about us. We will allow them to define and determine how we think of ourseleves and we will act accordingly.

Gerard said...

Curious, you took the words right out of my mouth. But I would add that Blackmen loving themselves is almost a revoultionary thing (in my opinion). Everything in this culture tells you not to. I'm beginning to think that fighting that, overcoming that, is a lifelong battle.

D-Place said...

Thanks Curious. It took me a long time to realize it too and a lot of pain. I try not to act accordingly all the time. I have to remind myself that I love me. And the others are just trying to get someone to love them.

Gerard, I don't think we ever become perfect at it but must practice it continually. month by month, day by day and sometimes moment by moment. If you love yourself then I think it's easier to love someone else. If if they don't.

blkbutterfly said...

wow... you always get what you need, right when you need it. :-) thanks so much for this.

BronzeBuckaroo said...

This post helped me.

D-Place said...

Blkbutterfly...I guess that's just how the universe works.

Bronze...I'm glad it helped you. It helped me too.

Gerard said...

D-Place, I totally agree with you, especially the "moment by moment." Thank you for this post. Words can save lives.

Anonymous said...

Man, you put it down with this post!

What did Kat Williams say? When questioning why people get all worked up over people who try to bring them down, I believe he said something to the effect of, "It is a hater's job to hate. Let them hate."

Sometimes those in our world can rock it if we are not in control of it. I LOVE the fact that you realized that your soul is whole. You loving yourself and feeling good (just like my girl, Ms. Stephanie Mills) is very inspiring. Others can learn from you.

HisLoveCoversMe said...

Nice blog man, Very Nice. You've been Bookmarked.

BronzeBuckaroo said...

Sorry.

fuzzy said...

I really have been there on more than one occassion! Its not too cute to feel that way. I don't cast the blame on others and their situations and motives for doing whatever they are doing but I just rise and rise so I don't need to care!

I am glad that you had a moment(s) or realization.

Arch City Expatriate said...

Great piece.

Refreshingly therapeutic. Thanks for sharing.