Patience

I have been popping patience pills for awhile now. But lately I feel like I'm about to overdose. I haven't been blogging or reading blogs for a few days.

Since the new year I have worked my A$$ off. I'm being stressed to the limit with things that people expect of me and those that are disregarding me.

I remember years ago someone told me that I didn't know how to say no. So I learned but lately I feel like my lessons have been lost. I need to practice...no no no no no no, no dammit!

I hope to be back to normal next week. Sorry I haven't been around for a few days.

Oh yeah I almost got kicked off the Africa trip. I'll have to blog about that one of these days. Still pissed off about it. But I am going and can't wait!!!

Honored

I was given an award and a very nice compliment that caused me to be at a loss for words. This is why...Moanerplicities gave me the Helping Hand award that you see to the left. I remember when I first started blogging I was doing it just to practice writing and to get some things off my chest. I guess I'm still doing that. I read many blogs and thru those blogs I found my own voice. Moanerplicities' blog was one that I always read and find it always soulful. I'm a soul child so that always turns me on. Right on to Moanerplicities!! :-) See the verbiage for the award and what those awarded should do next.

Receiving the Emblem in recognition for your mentoring, support, and encouragement to a fellow blogger is no small fete! It is evidence that you have gone well beyond the call of duty by your continued efforts to "leave the pile higher than you found it"! It is further evidence that your blog(s)has been identified as the epitome of excellence and is certainly admired.Thank you for your inspiration.

1. Simply Fred Smith - Thanks for getting me started!

2. Black

3. Just 4 Today

4. Fuzzy

5. Coming Into My Own - I call her Beautiful Black Butterfly

Receiving the Emblem from a seasoned blogger is a testimony to you that you're on the right track! That your voice is being heard. And there are those out here in the blogsphere that recognize your potential even if you don't. Keep up the good work, and remember to "Pay it Forward".Even though you may already be "seasoned", continue to inspire:

1. The Gayte-Keeper

2. Forever I Love Atlanta

3. Look At This Nigger

4. D'eonte K's Spot

5. A Day In The Life of Kendall

* I know I'm not supposed to do this but I want to give the award to all those in D-Favorite Places cuz they all inspire me. That's why their favorites. But the rules were to only list 10.

The Rules:

1. Select 10 bloggers: 5 you consider your blogging Helping Hand then "Pay it Forward" by extending your "Helping Hand" to 5 additional bloggers in support and encouragement for their efforts.

2. In passing on the Emblem, each recipient must provide the name of blog or blog author with a link for others to visit.Each recipient must show the Emblem and put the name and link to the blog that has given it to her or him.

3. Link the Emblem to this post: Helping Hand: Much Obliged and Paying it Forward so that others will know it origin and impetus.

4. If you have not already done so, show your recipients some love by adding them to your blog roll, Technorati Favorite list, or in any other way to further let them know that their blog voice is important to you and being heard.

5. Add your name to The Helping Hand meme and don't forget to leave a comment as a permanent record of all Helping Hand recipients.

6. Display the rules.

Happy Black President's Day!

Happy Black President's Day yall!

As Martin Luther King, Jr and President Barack Obama used words of hope. So do I. I hope for small changes that make big impacts.

The picture in this post is the subject of my hope. Hope that young and old Black men will be seen in a new light. A light that doesn't focus on our faults, so vividly displayed by the media at every turn, but on the strengths of our character, creativity, intelligence, commitment and beauty.

I dreamed as did Martin of this day. I pray for healthy relationships, successful ambitions, meaningful lives, and abundant resiliency.

Times were very different..be thankful

Not so very long ago things in America were very different. About 20 years ago when people were dying like flies from AIDS their going home celebrations were not always dignified. Here's an example:

Vernon

Vernon a gay man served in the armed forces. I met Vernon through his ex lover Greg as they remained very good friends. Soft spoken, with his military discipline he had a kind heart and embraced me as a new friend. I was the youngest of their group of friends. There was always something going on. From a party, bar-b-Que, road trip to San Francisco or San Diego, beach parties, you name it they always included me.

As I began to get a little older and find my way through Los Angeles on my own with the lessons they had taught me. I would see Vernon out at the club or just around the city. He still looked good and still had that smile that let you know he cared about you.

Years later I heard that Vernon had AIDS and he wasn't doing very well. He was home with his mother here in Los Angeles. Maybe 3 weeks after I heard the news of his illness, I received another phone call that Vernon had died and given the details of his funeral.

I was there for the service that was held at the funeral home. His home Church would not allow his AIDS ridden body into the Lord's house. I remember the night when he passed and Greg and Vernon's mother attempted to find a Funeral Home that would take him. None of the Black popular funeral homes in L.A. would take him so they settled for a small one in the Black community. The white funeral homes were called too but all hung up once they found out the cause of his death.

After a few days of his body laying in the hospital the small black funeral home picked him up. The funeral home told his mother that they would be able to embalm him unlike most of the other homes that would not even if they did take him. As the ritual is you give the funeral home the clothes that you want the deceased to be buried in. His mother purchased a brand new Armani Suit (like Vernon always wanted), shoes, shirt and tie.

On the day of the funeral Vernon's mother was told by the Funeral Director that the service would be a closed casket funeral, due to the effects of embalming a person with AIDS. The service went on without a hitch. The procession formed and we were off to the cemetery. While following the hearse all of a sudden it stopped in front of the cemetery gates. We all pulled over and got out of our cars to find out what was wrong.

I walked over to Greg who was riding with Vernon's mother and he told me that, Vernon's mother insists on seeing her son before he is put in the ground. The reason they stopped outside the cemetery's gates is because this was a military cemetery and once inside Vernon would be the property of the military and nothing could be done. They tried to get the Funeral Director to open the casket right there. They were insistent but to no avail the Director said it was illegal to do that. They said the only way they could open the casket would be back at the funeral home.

Back to the funeral home we went. I can not imagine what was going on in the heads of the funeral home employees and director as we headed back. Once back at the funeral home they took the casket into a back room where they would allow only Vernon's mother and Greg to enter. All was silent outside the room waiting for this to end so that we could take Vernon to his final resting place. Moments later we hear arguing, the Funeral Director didn't want to open the casket. I understand that Greg pushed him out of the way and opened the casket. The next sounds was the scream and wailing of Vernon's mother.

The funeral home had not touched Vernon's nude body that still lay in the sheets from the hospital bed stuffed in a body bag! The Police were called and so was the news. An hour later only the Police had arrived. There was no news to report this travesty.

The task of finding another funeral home as you can guess was difficult. One was however found and this time there was no service. Just the burial. Vernon was buried in his Armani Suit, shoes, shirt and tie this time. He was put to rest finally with dignity.

I'm very thankful to have had Vernon as a friend.

Times were very different. I'm also, thankful that those living with AIDS are no longer dying as quickly as they were in the past.

This was a true story...I'm hopeful with these changing times that we will have much more to be thankful for.

I was moved

I know that everyone that comes to my blog is a reader. You might not read in the traditional way of picking up a book from the library, bookstore or ordering one online, but you are ravenous readers all the same. Your choice might be to read from the Internet. If that is the case ebooks are a great opportunity for you.

In my D Brothas in Bizness 4 Themselves (located just below my followers that I really appreciate on this blog) a friend of mine Chuma has a publishing company and he also writes himself. He asked me to check out the excerpt from his latest book which I did without question. The title of the book is "My Ancestors Traveled Them Home" for the small cost of $5.99 to be read on your computer or to be printed if you prefer to feel the pages. You can also read an excerpt before purchasing it by clicking on Chuma's eBooks. I purchased the book and read it in it's entirety in a very short period of time.

After reading it I sent Chuma the email below. If my response intrigues you support him by reading it as well:

Chuma,

I can't believe I sat here and read the whole thing 1st of all. Your book was one of the most beautiful and heartfelt pieces of work that I have ever read in my entire life!!

I love it and I love you so very much for being able to express your feelings and thoughts so vividly. The experiences you had may not be the same for everyone but they certainly allow the reader to relate and even release some of the pain that they have not been able to resolve before reading your work. I am speaking for others but my self as well.

As I read your book many of the people that I have loved and lost came to mind. Also, the ones that are still here and I love were brought to the forefront of my mind including you of course. I had thoughts of my death and how beautiful it would be if I had someone to eulogize me as beautifully as you did your mother. I have often struggeled attempting to write about the loss of so many family members and friends that I have loved and even though the words still fail me to a certain extent. You helped to give voice to some of my own thoughts.

Your book is a testament to all on why they should love hard and completely.

Thank you so very much for sharing that with me.

Sincerely always loving you while wiping tears from my eyes with the back of my hand.

Your friend forever,
D

Greed

Did you know that in 2007 America spent $161.8 billion dollars on terrorism? 2,000 people have been killed on account of terrorism, 70 of whom were American.

Did you know that heart disease is the number one cause of death in America killing 450,000 people a year. America spends $2.9 billion on research for this disease.

This means we spend 54 times the amount on terrorism than heart disease which causes more deaths.

I believe greed has something to do with this.

I got this information from a dvd that a friend shared with me called The Zeitgeist Movement. There was a lot of other information in this DVD as well that sums up the world as being corrupt. I didn't think that that was such a big revelation in the documentary but how this corruption was achieved might be interesting to some. The documentary also talked about how we can change from a monetary system that caused all of this greed an classism in the first place.

It also talked of changing to a resource based society. Check out The Venus Project to see how they believe we can accomplish that if your interested.

Muscle Relaxers

I was looking around youtube and this clip reminded me of when I had a dental procedure where they were going to have to put me to sleep. So the doctor gave me a pill to take 2 hours before my appointment. On my way to the appointment the pill kicked in. Man oh man oh man. I felt like I was in utopia and everything around me was absolutely gorgeous and I didn't have a worry in the world. Needless to say the Doctor wouldn't tell me what the pill was the bastard. Hee Hee but it's probably best he didn't cuz I was feeling hella good!

Enjoy a good laugh on me.